Maybe one of these quotes from Thomas Merton may lodge in your mind today… hopefully something to mull over as you go about your day and night.

“Every moment and every event of every man’s life on earth plants something in his soul.”

“Pride makes us artificial and humility makes us real.”

Oh and one more, cause I can’t help myself!

“Solitude is not something you must hope for in the future. Rather, it is a deepening of the present, and unless you look for it in the present you will never find it.”

It happened more than twenty years ago. Yet the feelings, fears, and realizations of the day in question are as vivid as ever. I had just finished my second year of college and was interning with a Methodist church in St. Petersburg, FL. I was priviledged to intern under a great pastor who was a master at providing memorable and learning-filled days. This particular day I walked into Roger’s office and he laid hands on me and prayed for me. He then told me to get my Methodist Minister’s prayer book and to head to the hospital for a visitation.

After swallowing my stomach, I managed a replied that didn’t do to well at hiding my complete and utter terror (I had no problem teaching, leading worship, public reading - really anything that had to do with being in front of folks - but one-on-one in a hospital - YIKES!). Now the person I was to visit in the hospital was in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit of the local Children’s Hospital. The little girl weighed less than four pounds and had been in an incubator under constant care since being born a few weeks before my visit. The 8 or so mile trip to the hospital seemed to take hours.

I stressed the whole drive. What would I say to the parents? What would they think of the Junior Pastor? What passage of scripture would be meaningful? How do I transition from talking about everyday stuff to spiritual stuff? How does Roger do this? Do I want to do this for a living? Who would know if I just drove around the hospital six or seven times and then head back to church? Am I going to be able to find the Neo Natal Unit? Do I touch the baby? Do I talk to this premmie? The questions just kept coming; hijaking my thoughts and tormenting me. Finally I arrived at the parking garage for my destination.

Well, after I got past the receptionist desk I found my way to Neonatal ICU. I got all dressed up in the required medical scrubs and made my way to my church member’s incubator. I arrived to find that both parents weren’t around… it was just me and this infant member of God’s Body. I stood there - a little like a deer caught in the headlights - I hadn’t prepared for this scenario! What am I to do? Will this little baby know the difference? I tried to put my fears and uncertainty aside and under the gaze of a doctor and a few nurses on the unit I put my hand into the incubator and stroked the little girls back and began to say the only prayer I knew by heart - I recited the Lord’s Prayer. I don’t know how long I was there - I recall praying the Lord’s Prayer more than a few times, I rehearsed Psalm 23 and a few spontaneous prayers (I forgot my Methodist Minister’s Manual in the car). Time seemed to go by in a flash and after wiping a tear from my eye my time with that little one ended.

I thanked the nurses for letting me visit St. Mark’s youngest church member and headed for my car. It was while I was driving back to church that it hit me for the first time. This visitation stuff isn’t about me or what I can do. It isn’t about what I bring to folks. Ministry, in general, isn’t about what I can plan or offer from some “bag of tricks.” It was about joining with what God is up to in our world. It is about a trust in the invisible Mystery of the Universe and allowing Him to be at work in and through the situations I find myself in. It is not about my words, or my insecurities, or my agenda or plan… it was and is and will always be about my faith in God revealing His Way and Will and Kingdom in our midst. That morning I saw a glimmer of God’s Kingdom shinning through in a pre-mature baby laying in an incubator gently and tenderly being cared for and remembered by the Shepherd of all of our Souls (my next solo visitation Roger sent me on a week or two later was to a gentleman in a coma from complications with AIDS - and there again the lesson was reinforced).

Do you ever find yourself in a rut. Do you find your daily life moving from one project to the next; or worse one distraction to another? If you are honest have you found yourself disconnected from what really matters? Have you found yourself emotionally stagnant or relationally distant? Have you found yourself wooed by this world’s lure of acquiring more, “needing more” and chasing the latest fad?

It is easy to find oneself in the “matrix” of the world’s charms. It is easy to become disconnected from what really matters. In my own life, where my work finds me in front of a 17 inch computer screen for long stretches of the day - the reality of nature and the elements of wind, rain, snow, and sunlight can become minimized to a picture on my computer wallpaper. How do we keep from becoming the next victims of the matrix? How can we stay in touch with the real, with what matters, with God’s top priorities (over against what the world attempts to hawk on us)?

In the life of Jesus we see a regular pattern emerge that Jesus often “stole away” to the wilderness. The wilderness in the geography of Palestine, of course, would mean - heading off to the desert. Richard Rohr, a Franciscan Monk and founding director of The Center for Action and Contemplation makes the following observation,

The desert is where you go apart from the world order as it is. It’s where you simply stop being trapped in the world’s addictive patterns. If you are addicted to the world’s or your own patterns, you really need to go apart; otherwise you’ll never stop sleepwalking…. What Jesus is talking about, first and foremost, is how do you enter into the real Now. Jesus gives us “real eyes” to “realize” where the “Real lies.” (from Richard Rohr - Jesus’ Plan for a New World)

That is an amazing observation. That is what so many of us need - time away from our patterns and from being immersed in the “matrix.” When was the last time you entered, the NOW? When was the last time you really “saw?” When was the last time the thought, “I am ALIVE!” entered your brain?

The desert can revive us to life and refuel us to live (now how about that for a paradox?!). It is in the desert that we can again hear God, connect with the Mystery and become cognizant of the present moment.

We spend too much time preparing to REALly live. We live far to often in the future. NOW is our moment. Get out of the matrix! Do whatever it takes to regularly walk with God in the desert, in the place where we can be re-shaped, revived, and realize where the real lies.

What is this life if, full of care,

We have no time to stand and stare.

– from “Leisure,” by W.H. Davies

According to the Christian liturgical calendar - we have entered, the holiest week of the year. This week we commemorate the last week of Jesus’ earthly life. This is important when you consider that a little less than half of each of the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John in the New Testament) is focused on this 7 day period. My time in the evangelical church didn’t seem to provide that kind of focus or attention to the events in this week. Too often we would go from the revelry of Palm Sunday to the celebration of Easter.

May we slow down this week and rather than get caught up in how to make our Easter Celebration bigger and better, let’s take each day in this week - one day at a time. Maybe you could take time to slowly read the Gospel accounts; a bit each day:

Mon - John 12:1-11 & Mark 14:3-9
Tue - Psalm 71:1-14 & John 12:20-36
Wed - Psalm 70 & John 13:21-35
Thu - Psalm 116:1-2, 12-19 & John 13:1-17 & 31-35
Fri - Psalm 22 & John 18:1-19:42
Sat - Psalm 31:1-4, 15-16 & Matthew 27:57-66
Sun - Psalm 118:1-2, 14-24 & John 20:1-18 & Luke 24:1-12

As you read - take enough time to hear the Living Word (is there an issue God might be pointing out or an invitation to respond too?). As you read - take time to reflect on your own life in light of these events (if you looked at your life from the perspective of Jesus - what might you see?). As you read - find a phrase or word that you can “take with you” as a prayer for the remainder of the day.

Enter this holiest of weeks and walk again with Jesus, one day at a time.

It is pretty amazing isn’t that we come out of the womb, breathing. Merely seconds old and we instinctually gasp for breath. We don’t even know what oxygen is at this point (and probably won’t until a lesson on plants in 1st or 2nd grade) but our moments-old lung scream out and we inhale. Following this line of reasoning one would think that we would naturally understand how to “breath” when it comes to basking in the presence of God.

For me I have had to “work” at “breathing spiritually.” It has taken mistakes and intentional exercises to help me care for my soul and ensure that I am authentically in relationship with God and others before I call others to follow Christ. If you have struggled in continuing to grow in your relationship with Christ while in ministry - you are not alone. In fact, the majority of folks I have talked to (in their most honest moments) have confided in me that it has been a struggle to have a growing and intimate relationship with the Mystery of the Universe.

One major way I try to stay mindful, aware and attentive to God throughout the day is through a habit many refer to as, “practicing the presence of God.” This phrase is derived from a 17th century Carmelite Monk named Brother Lawrence (a book entitled The Practice of the Presence of God was published from his journal after he died). The practice is one which is pretty simple in thought - a bit harder to actually do! In short it calls us to recollect our thoughts, in the midst of daily routine, back to the Giver of all good gifts. So, for example, we can turn to God during the routine of say, brushing our teeth. As we brush our teeth we can recollect our thoughts to God thinking, “You alone make me white as snow.” We just allow this thought to pass through our mind gently the entire time we polish our pearly whites. That is just one example.

I try to infuse my life with spiritual breaths by practicing God’s presence in my routines. As a gentleman, suburban horse farmer - when I am cleaning the horses stalls I practice the Presence by inviting God to reveal and remove my sin. When I am filling buckets, I rehearse the thought of, “refresh.” When I am caring for the horses, I thank God and remember God’s perfect and attentive care for me. It makes those moments sacred, and our stable a sacred-place for me. I am trying to find other places in my routines where I can incorporate this holy habit.

Do you have routines that you regularly find yourself in? Is there a way to make that a time to recollect yourself and re-connect with your Heavenly Father? Is this something you already do? Can you share and encourage others with your practices? We may not need to learn to breath when we come out of the womb, but after we are born again it seems we need breathing lessons. May we encourage and help one another in this way.