on roles and expectations
One of the blogs I frequent written by Mark Riddle had a great post on the role of the youth pastor. I felt a profound sense of relief and resonance with Mark’s thought on the topic. I am praying that this kind of thinking will become more prevalent in our churches and more of a non-negotiable among those called to be in youth work.
I remember one day on a retreat writing down all the different roles I played as a youth worker. It was out of control. I didn’t save the list, but I know that the following were on it - roles I fulfilled over one months time.
The roles didn’t include other things outside of my job - like father, son, husband, friend…
To say that the calling on youth workers can get confusing is an understatement. There are many expectations among those we serve and among those we work for. Youth Workers themselves don’t always make it easy either, they can bring a bit of baggage to the role, as well (another set of competing hopes, dreams and expectations!). What I see when I look at such a list (like the one above) is that we can think in terms of the calling to youth ministry as something we fulfill by what we DO rather than something of the person we ARE BECOMING. When we think in terms of youth ministry we seem to act like the greatest thing we can offer others is something we DO for them - and honestly this is where things get mixed up. We find outselves on a hamster wheel of youth ministry activities and events. I believe those in youth ministry need to rethink the activity assumption. We need to consider that the calling of youth ministry might be a calling to offer others who we are becoming.
What if the call to youth ministry is a call to offer others the very thing we see Jesus offering the disciples, an offer to be with Him (Mark 3:13-14). The sharing of our life. The glimpse at our flaws and at God’s gracious work taking shape in us. To share our journey of becoming more like Christ. To offer commentary on how God is shaping our story.
Responding to God’s call to minister with/for youth by being who we are in the midst of a community of students is a profound new way to think about the primary role of youth pastor. This doesn’t mean we DO nothing; but it does mean we don’t DO everything. It means that lots of activity doesn’t necessarily mean that ministry is happening. It means rethinking the shape of youth ministry staffs, programs, and traditions. It means re-pacing the ministry seasons and years. It demands a review and revision of the typical job description and enlarging our vision of the skill set and demeanor of a youth ministry candidate. It requires that churches seriously consider the priorities of what the church should offer it’s youth. It requires a team approach - it is the church body’s obligation to minister to it’s people, not merely a church employee’s. Much more could be said about this, and over time I am sure (and hoping) that it will be said, by more and more who love the church and love her youth!
Thanks Mark for your thoughts and for inspiring me to give this some thought. I hope this new picture of the youth pastor begins to fill the vision of our churches.
Thank you Doug. This is a great post.
thanks for stopping by Mark.
well said…i too have made THE LIST of all the different roles I play as youth minister…especially when i hear people asking, “what exactly do you do?” oh how we love that question…”well, let me tell you…” i’ve really been thinking through this idea of being the Church rather than doing Church since last summer when my husband and I spent some time in Israel and began to grasp the meaning of Jesus’ ministry more fully. i’m so glad people like yourself, and others, are saying these things and challenging us to reimagine ministry. I’m looking forward to watching the culture of youth ministry shift as we continue dialoguing around these ideas and they begin to set in and become the way we minister…
bring that day, the days of being the church rather than “doing church”… thanks for the thoughts lisa!
Shifting perspectives for a moment …
As the parent of a 13 yo … I don’t want my daughter in a youth ministry “program” where she is being entertained like that. We’ve recently left our church (as you know). I was having a conversation with a friend yesterday who left with us. We were talking about what next and what to do with our children (her oldest is 10). I realized that I don’t want a place where my children are entertained to death. I want them to learn how to “be the Church” as well. They can’t do that when they are lead by people who are busy working that list. My friend agreed.
Unfortunately, we don’t know of any places in our area where this is being worked out. So … we may have to start it ourselves
(big cheesy grin).
Sonja-
I am not sure it is an either/or dichotomy. But I think in too many youth ministry circles doing has trumped being! There is clearly a place for both action and becoming; being and doing; program and relationship… but I am not sure I know of any real good examples to point to in Northern VA (not because I know there aren’t any - but because I don’t know). I would strongly suggest picking up Mark Yaconelli’s Contemplative Youth Ministry - it is a great starting point for beginning a dialogue to consider a framework and process for a new work that focuses on both prayer and action, the inner and outer dimensions of life in Christ, etc.
sonja,
I work with a church in northern virginia.
where do live?
mark@theriddlegroup.com
that last comment should have said,
Sonja,
Though I live in Tulsa, the Riddle Group has partnered with a church in Northern Virginia who is rethinking youth ministry around these very lines.
Do you live in Northern Virginia? The church we have partnered with is in Sterling. Great folks.
Thanks, Mark …
I do live in Northern Virginia … a little west (or south?) of Sterling in Manassas. I’d be curious to know church it is that you’re working with?
St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church is the name of the church.
nice. this is sweet!
My church is thinking about hiring a part time youth minister, but we do not know how much to pay him. Our church is very small on a good sunday we might have 60 people so as you can see we do not have alot of money but this is the reason we feel we need a youth minister. We need to try to get young people in. our church is made up of 65 or older there are only about 10 of us below 50. Can you please help?